Where did the moral-less barstaff in Cambrian go?

Me: I miss when the barman just fucks you over and doesn’t tell you what he’s doing.

Speaking from experience?

Torin: Better to have a burnt ballsack than a burnt nose

Oh aye!

Clarey: What am I sitting on…something hard.

You’d think it an easy thing to find…

Amz: I can’t find my giant blue head!

Toad Sex

Sion: I’m losing my toad in the hole virginity!

Colourblindness

Auntie Issy: We’re colourblind in the dark.

Guitar.

Me: I can do that bit better with my tongue than he can with his fingers.

When I grow up I wanna be…

Sion: I wanna be a spaceman!
Steph: Well I wanna be a spaceSHIP!!!!
Me:…so…you want Sion to be inside you?
Steph: >.<"
Sion: Yeh you really didn't think that through.

Halloween Shenanigans

James: This is my clunge…flick it in the vag

(Yeh I have no idea what that is even supposed to mean. James is a pretty weird guy…especially when he’s drunk xD)

James: (to Torin) We will find some vag curtains for you!

(See what I mean?)

Meelie: (after Torin caused them both to fall over in a heap in the middle of the road) He abused me in the fanny!!

Haberdashery Innuendo

Shop assistant: I want a 32 inch chunky

She was talking zips…honest.

Steph I presume?

Well she’s usually the one talking about vaginas and such so I guess these were hers.

“My vagina is massive…but not in a bad way”

“I’m so coming. It hurts”

Almost forgot about this quote D:

Me: I think I might wear something else…these are only worth wearing when you can see the strap on

Almost quote

Me: You’re so lucky, I was gonna spit that at you but then I decided it’d be better….wait that sounds wrong >.<"

Trivial Pursuit

We were using the Trivial Pursuit questions to play a drinking game…we may have been fairly drunk by this point…

Rhian: What Vladimir Nabokov novel finds Professor Humbert having an affair with a 12-year old girl?
Both: Ewww gross
Me: No idea
Rhian: John the Baptist… :O dirty fucker!
Me: WTF?
Rhian…oh no wait that’s the answer to the history question >.<"
*10min giggling fit*

I don’t think I want to find out how that game is played D:

Marc: I wanna play cockband!

I don’t remember this quote happening, or writing it down…literally just discovered it xD Was this during Grad Week?

Sound advice (Y)

Ryan: It’s easier to get out if it’s in the right hole

Ahh childhood memories tainted by innuendo

Marc: *to Sion I think* Don’t you remember doing that when you needed more rubber on your pencil?

Anyone wanna claim ownership of these quotes?

“I let mine go all floppy”
“Put it in me”

This is exactly why I need to update ASAP and not let myself forget who said what :(

Hott

Lauren: I’d get a strap-on and do Jo Brand from behind

in response to overhearing people play “would you rather…”

Sometimes boobs aren’t all that great :(

Me: My problem is I have tits so I can’t get it up

Yes I did actually, unwittingly say this xD
To clarify I was on about hula hooping D:

Don’t drink and ride kids

My little brother came home drunk xD

Mum: Did you ride your bike home like that?
Ryan: Yerrr….I only fell off once

xD

Do all our quotes occur in Rummers or am I just to drunk to notice any afterwards?

Sion: *to Marc:* So I didn’t have to go down your groin?

I think Lauren said this: What so you’re saying breasts didn’t exist before computers? …what a tit!

It’s been too long since a good Lauren quote occured

Lauren: Meerkat porn! *sits up like meerkat* That hot guy is talking to Marc!!

Lauren: I just caught my nipple on the hand dryer :(

I really should note who says what >.<"

Sion ( I think?): You will eat my pie and you will enjoy it!

???(probably Steph given the subject): I want to find the hole and blow it

Holes.

Again all by Steph:

“Get out of my hole!”

“Aw! Fill it with water then put it in my hole”

“Are you fisting my hole?”

Only the last one was said deliberately xD